Now you must remember I initially thought this would all happen alot quicker and this planning was a good idea because soon I would have a baby, but when that never happened I guess the forward planning just kept going. I plan my clothes, I think I must not throw that dress out that I haven't worn in a million years as It's nice and stretchy and will be good for when I'm pregnant, I forward plan with buying baby clothes, I have a bag of clothes and other goods up in the wardrobe, knitted clothes my mum started when I told her we were trying for a baby, I have a baby bath (as you know from previous posts, this has many uses, not just for a baby)!. I have borrowed a bouncenette and a play gym that is under the spare bed waiting to be used. I forward plan with the spare room, I have planned I will get rid of the double bed to make more room and buy a nice arm chair to feed the baby in in their room at night. I plan that we need a new little cupboard in the kitchen to put bottles, sterilizer, cups, plates, spoons, bibs etc in. I plan that I want a white cot, and that Gardener guy needs to turn into painter guy and paint the drawers in the spare room white. I plan that as soon as I get my positive, Ill be right off to the bookshop to arm myself with reading material on pregnancy and birth. I tell you what I am so organized for this baby, so damn sorted, so damn ready, that it's so ironic that the only thing I cant plan is when it will be arriving.
It makes me mad at all these couple's who get pregnant who have nothing planned and ever so casually start to buy stuff and get the babies room sorted 2 weeks before their arrival! Are you even excited? I will be so happy and so grateful and so excited that I will have everything organised and ready to go months before hand. I am waiting so patiently for this plan to be put into action, but I cannot wait any longer. It's excruciating. Until you have waited for something so precious as a baby for so long you can never get how shitty this is. Let me start the plan! god damn it! Gardener guy wont know what hit him, I tell ya when we get the go ahead, It will be like the start of a construction job, out will come all the blueprints (aka the big list of what to buy) and instead of reaching for a gardening book to read beside his bed it will be replaced with a book with some kind of creepy title like " the dad's guide to babies, boobs and bottles". Gardener guy will look confused and search for his gardening book but.......... when he opens his drawer he will be greeted with " First time Fathering" . Ahhhhhh........... And that will only be the beginning, he will open a kitchen cupboard, bam, out jumps a strange pump like contraption, is this an attachment to that food processor we were given? this will be followed by me giving him a demonstration of how I have turned from the wife with the sexy DD breasts, to the wife who resembles a cow in the milking shed. If all this seems like enough, well there will be more, His shed will be filled with buggy's, various out door toys, I will take over every corner of his life with my forward planning. He wont even know who the heck he is after I've finished with him, He will have knowledge coming out of his ass, I will bombard him with plans for the babies sleeping, feeding, what we will do when we get home from the hospital, what the baby will wear, when he is allowed to touch the baby (just kidding!!!), I'm not that controlling! well not quite. But do you know what, He will love every second of it. All my husband wishes is that he can soon see me properly happy, and he knows there is only one way for this to happen, so he wont care how crazy and over the top I become because I will be happy, and I bet he will be crazy and over the top right along side me, as this is all he wants too.
Planning when I get our baby is something I haven't been able to do, its out of my control and I hate that. I don't know when it will come into our lives, but when it does I can happily regain my control and forward plan. Oh dear I will have my child's life planned up until its bloody 20yrs old. Well no not really, I will never plan my child's life for them, once they are old enough to decide what they want, all I can hope for is that they are happy, feel loved and as far as I'm concerned they can plan that any way they please.
You sound armed with all the knowledge and goods that you need for you bubba. It's incredibly frustrating when there is no light at the end of the tunnel. I just want to know when this road ends? Someone upstairs has really stuffed this up, and I'm not sure what good it is doing.
ReplyDeleteI hope your motherhood begins really really soon. You have done your time, shed your tears, and poured out your heart. Enough is enough!
I thought I was the only one that has been keeping clothes in the vain hope that one day they'll come in handy when I get pregnant!! Only to find I've been keeping them for two years!
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on wanting to organise everything... and have it all planned in advance :) When we started TTC about 10 months ago, I had the EDD all planned out and holidays organised around it etc... found it in my diary the other day :( Planning is great... except when it come to TTC :(( If only we had a crystal ball to know when it would happen :)) Love you you talk about your future kids... they will be very lucky to have you as a mum xoxo
ReplyDeleteInfertility is a night mare for us planner types isn't it? I can't bring myself to buy anything because I don't want to jinx myself but I too have everything planned out it my head. I am trying so hard to be patient but my patience is wearing thin at this point!
ReplyDeleteI am a huge planner too - that's been really difficult with TTC. Every month I used to pay attention to what my EDD would be if I got pregnant, how far I would be along at holidays, etc. It's gotten better during the past few months though.
ReplyDeleteYup, planner here, too. We have names, we know we want a Winnie the Pooh nursery, we know we want a nanny and not a daycare, we know we want a doula (wanted a home birth originally but they won't do that for IVF, so scratch that out), we know we want to move to a better school district, I have baby books and I even have a pair of pirate sneakers for 6-month old that I got for $1 at a store when I was 19. Just in case, I thought. Oh boy.
ReplyDeleteBut as someone said before, at least that means when we all get our BFPs, everything is all set :)
Your post made me laugh. Me and my husband are the exact opposite...he wants everything purchased and organized, all the books read ASAP (and not just the books about pregnancy, but the books about having a newborn, too). I'm a little scared that something bad might happen to my pregnancy and want to wait at least until the first trimester is over. But I know it makes my husband feel better to have everything together/organized so I'm going along...
ReplyDeleteIt's so hard not to be able to plan the conception...so unfair as so many people get to do that. My baby is coming about 12 years later than I planned...
Hope you get your positive very soon...
-Kristen from www.buckupbuttercup.net
I am definitely a planner too! And to have our original plans not working - so very frustrated! Keep those plans coming!!!
ReplyDeleteHey so I have this friend, she's 16 and pregnant, and on her own, and needs some baby clothes, so you'd might as well give them to me and I will pass them on to her, I promise........:) hahaha
ReplyDeleteHAHA. Debs, although no one knows what you are talking about I do and appreciate it. So damn funny!
ReplyDeleteI am not a planner, but this is still hard after more than a year trying. Almost every week I hear of a couple her ooops..got pregnant!! Unbelievable! What is that about!!!
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