So you know you have officially lost the rights to your body when you wake up one morning to find you have leaked milk all over your top and through onto the sheets. One can only imagine how much milk I will have when the little fella is here, Ill be waking up swimming in the stuff.
This leads me to my first new development since my last post - breast pads. I didn't think I would really need these till he was born, and even then I was living under some romantic notion that my boobs would just tidily keep all the milk inside where it was meant to be. But oh no! After the leakage issue I went out and brought two crop top style bras, I wanted something comfortable to wear to bed that I could securely pop the breast pads into. So last night was the first night, in they went and of course I didn't leak a damn drop! I think I will just keep using these in bed as the night I decide not to put them in, it will be like Niagara falls! Ill have to recover my dead husbands body from drowning in milk.
Since my last post I also have been a bit up and down health wise, currently I feel good, touch wood. There is nothing wrong with me. But last Sunday/Monday/Tuesday I was not. Somehow I managed to pull a muscle in my side and boy did It hurt! apparently during pregnancy all your muscles are so much weaker and you are prone to all sorts of strains and pains, and what with the added weight (5.5kgs now and counting), it was obviously just too much! now this was no silly little pain in the side, oh no, this was full on. I wake up and feel like I have had a major surgery performed on me, I cannot walk, I cannot get out of bed, I cannot lie without pain, I cannot sit without pain. It was a shocker! at first I thought it may have been the baby lying in some kind of wacky side ways position, but soon realised he was far over the other side, rocking and rolling very oblivious of the pain his mother was in. Anyhow panadol every 4 hours and resting soon healed this up and I am now back to normal.
At my last midwife appointment which was last Tuesday the baby got measured, He is measuring 27cms. Apparently the baby grows a cm a week, So I was 25 weeks at that appointment so he was 2 weeks ahead! little fatso! The midwife never said he was huge or anything, just that I was doing well, baby was well and growing good. I'm not worried about his size, maybe he will come a bit early if he is cooking extra fast!
Perhaps the weirdest and something not really mentioned in pregnancy is my skin changes. It seems I have picked up a skin condition called Chloasma, basically its brownish patches that appear on your face, mostly forehead, upper cheeks and chin. This is triggered by an increase in hormones and an increase in your bodies production of melamin. I know its sounds horrific, but its not really that bad, its not like if you see me you wont recognize me, I have a few patches and its fairly light and you would never really notice it, but too me, someone who has to look at my face every day I can tell. So yes, its not really something you hear about but it is really common and tends to come on in the second trimester. It will fade away and disappear about 2 months after birth.
Someone asked me the other day what I wanted for Christmas and of course there are many things I want, I don't really need any of them, but I still want them. My husband is going to get me perfume and some surprise purchase, with strict instructions for me to stay away from peeking at the credit card bill! Anyhow this got me thinking about last Xmas. Last Xmas was not fun, I was not happy. On Xmas eve we got a phone call from the fertility clinic telling us our 3rd and final IUI had failed and we would need to move onto IVF. Of course we knew this call was coming, we were waiting all day for it, hoping and praying it would be a lovely Xmas gift, but it wasn't. It was damn hard, I had to try my hardest to pick myself up, and get on with Xmas the next day, not an easy feat. Luckily we had a nice trip planned so me and my husband got away together for a week or so and basked in the lovely NZ sun. Although this trip was just what we needed at the time, it was clouded by the bad news we had had, it didn't go away, where ever we went there were happy families enjoying each others company, oblivious to the fact that we were both in alot of emotional pain. Of course the pain subsided and we carried on and planned for IVF and getting back into all the roller coaster of drugs and craziness. All this just makes me so thankful that this Xmas we are in such a better place, we are so so lucky we can enjoy Xmas day and talk about the arrival of our son with our family and really really enjoy the day and have a real smile on our face. Its pretty amazing really! I know what it feels like to be at rock bottom and to be where I am now couldn't be further from that! It almost brings me to tears writing this as I think "poor you, how did you manage that", and that's what I think when I continue to read other woman's struggling blogs, "poor you", its so sad. Every single day is shit. I really hope Xmas is brighter for everyone this year.
Lets just hope for now I can get through the next few months without any embarrassing breast leaking incidents. No squirting across the room at someone, no leaking down my top making me look like I'm sweating profusely. Milk is best served from a carton, not an unexpected shot of it from a strangers boob. Oh well at least if times get really tough when the baby is born, my husband will still have a good supply of free milk to put on his breakfast cereal in the morning!!!! Kidding!