Well folks, even though I have no children of my own, I could quite easily write a guide to bad parenting, after having been in childcare for almost 10 years I have seen it all. I have heard every hair brain, pathetic excuse as to why their child doesn't sleep much, eat much and generally is just a little shit. I have heard it all. There is always an excuse from the parents, when really ill let you in on a little secret, its not bloody rocket science, It's just the parents fault!!! start good habits when the child is young and your away laughing.
I am going to let you in on a few things that I see over and over again, and quite frankly its just starting to piss me off. Really the majority of parents out there need to just get some damn ball! your child shouldn't rule your life, you shouldn't be afraid of upsetting your child. You are the adult so get a grip!
Two of the biggest complaints from parents are sleeping and eating. My child wont go to sleep, my child wont stay in their own bed, my child wont sleep for very long during the day, my child wakes so early in the morning, and my child wont eat much, my child is so fussy. Well its very simple really, and sometimes I just want to shake the shit out of parents, because honestly I feel like all their head must be filled with is shit, no brains. Start good habits early, for starters you need to get your child in their own room early on, weather you like it or not I believe this is very important, If your child keeps getting up to come to your bed, its not hard, you keep taking them back, they will eventually get it, don't give in. It will work. SIMPLE!, your child knows they can try it on with you, If they cry, you get them up, cuddle them, fluff around like an old lady. NO!, don't let them have the control, when they get to a certain age they need to learn to stay in there bed/cot without screaming, till you are ready to get them up, don't be dictated by their time schedule. This will eventually work, they will realise you are not going to get them up when they wake at 5.30am screaming, rather you are going to leave them there till an acceptable time. They will understand and stop screaming and just quietly chat away to themselves till YOU are ready.
Eating is much the same concept, you as a parent need to be in control. Again when your child gets to a certain age they will not die if they don't eat a full meal, they will not starve, if they are hungry they will eat. When you present your child with a meal, that is it. They take it or leave it. If they carry on and have a meltdown you don't give in and ask them what they want, god no, that is the meal you have made for them and that is what they will eat. Its always a good idea to reward good eating with a treat after, perhaps a biscuit, but if the meal is not eaten then no treat. Not hard is it? So many parents I come across are just too weak, they give in to quickly, they don't even give their child a chance to show them how clever and well behaved they can be, they create monsters.Your child will eat their dinner when they realise they are not going to get away with it.
Use that simple rule, " children will do as they are told when they know they have no other option" don't give them an option to be able to play up. Be in control!
Ok well that's enough of me on my high and mighty horse, I'm not sure where this came from, I just get so mad with my job sometimes. Just because I don't have my own child doesn't mean I cant give my advice, after all a builder who doesn't own his own home would still give advice on what to use to build a house, a doctor that doesn't have cancer can still give advice on the best treatment, so I'm no different.
After the weekend gardener guy seems to have got back to positive thinking, I even told him last night that this IVF was going to work and he replied "I know that, it will work", so that's really good, he is much more useful and happier when he gets himself in a postive frame of mind, even though we have done this before and we are yet to see it pay off. I have also been thinking a bit lately about the future and what it hold for us if this fails and how to move forward and deal with that, but Ill save that for another blog. For now we know where to keep our focus on and keep our eye on the prize.
I know everyone has a different approach to parenting and I would never try to force my opinions upon a parent as they are the best parent for their own child no matter how they go about it. I just think alot of parents make things harder for themselves which is a shame. Like everything in life, you put a bit of effort in at the beginning and you get more out of it in the end. That's what I'm trying to think with our quest to make a baby, we have put alot of effort into it and in the end we will get more out of it then we could ever imagine.